When people come to counseling, at a deep fundamental level they already know how to right themselves and regain their balance. They look for guidance, a place for reflection, trust, and unconditional acceptance. I reflect what wisdom is within them, those things they have forgotten, or have forgotten to practice. I help them notice their heart, listen to the cry of their own voice, and notice the miracle and preciousness of their existence. I hold up a mirror so that they can get a glimpse of themselves, their true self, without the masks they wear outside my office – giving them the chance to be honest, authentic, without being judged. Even though counseling changed my life and I have years of professional experience under my belt, it still amazes me how this process can impact those open to self exploration and new levels of awareness – by those willing to be authentic and honest with themselves and others, even if it stings a little. I have been honored by souls that have allowed me in to be a part of their process and change – to be a part of their healing on this sacred journey.
A friend of mine once asked, “Do you think I need therapy?” I responded with a question, “Do you have parents?” Now, I know that most parents want to do right, but we all have unfinished business to address, whether it’s with parents, siblings, in-laws, children, betrayers, teachers, abusers, bullies, co-workers, ex-spouses, or people who are out of lives that we want back in. Overtime the baggage we carry around in our hearts and minds can overwhelm us. We create many guises and mal-adaptive behaviors to cover our pain and vulnerabilities.
It took me a while to get here, to the place I am right now. This road has had many twists and turns and is still constantly changing - evolving. From growing up in a single parent home, dealing with issues from the abandonment of my biological father, and an alcoholic step-parent, to my own struggles of marriage, divorce, and being a parent myself, I know that life sometimes takes us places that we had no intention of going or had control over. From these trying personal experiences, I have found that it is easier to maintain a level of contentment by regulating myself (my thinking, fantasy, and breathing), rather than trying to get all of my ducks in a row. (As soon as they are in a row, I, something, or somebody else will knock them out of alignment.) Trying to micro-manage life is crazy making. The road keeps moving beneath my feet. I have choices. I can be in the present. I can look forward with either fear or excitement. I can look into the past with regret, resentment or respect. I have met many people in my journey. Some still walk with me. Others have moved on.
As a therapist I believe it is important to continue to work on myself. I have facilitated, seminars, workshops with professional therapists and life coaches in places as close as Dallas, Texas and as far away as Warsaw, Poland. Regardless of where one resides, there appears to be a longing at the core of every human being; a longing to be heard, understood, loved, valued, and accepted.
As a musician, I will at times utilize music/songwriting in therapy; I use songwriting and music as a way of healing myself and others. I find this avenue especially effective with teens.
You can hear me at http://www.reverbnation.com/paulallenshearer
2340 East Trinity Mills Suite 300
Carrollton TX 75006
1977 B.A. from Texas Christian University
1979 M.A. from University of Dallas
1993 M.Ed. from the U.N.T.
Licenses and Certifications
Licensed Professional Counselor
Adjunct Faculty Member of The Gremlin Taming Institute
Certified Gestalt Therapist
Family Therapy Training
I have been involved in a therapeutic training group for Licensed Counselors since 1993, and at times facilitate that group.